Ubiquitous
2024-04-11 08:30:45 UTC
Few knew what to expect when Daily Wire podcast host Matt Walsh announced he
was ascending the bench to hand down legally binding decisions in small
claims court. But no one could have predicted the curious case of exploding
lips.
Episode one set the stage for a hilariously unpredictable season of JUDGED
by Matt Walsh. One of the first cases on the docket involved Daphne Lewis,
who brought a suit against Tam Taylor regarding a payment dispute over
cosmetic products they agreed to purchase together.
Lewis told Judge Walsh that she is owed $1,500 for Korean lip filler she
ordered for both of them. But Taylor opted to countersue, claiming that her
lips literally exploded during a flight at 30,000 feet after getting the
injections. Taylor insisted she was owed $5,000 for the medical expenses
related to reconstructing her mangled lips.
The episode features some graphic photos of Taylors lips post-explosion.
Judge Walsh responded by noting that while he has a lot of fears and
anxieties about flying on planes, he never stopped to worry that maybe part
of my body will explode.
Walsh chastised both women for opting for cosmetic surgery in the first
place. He ultimately ruled that both women were at fault for refusing to age
gracefully, but rejected Taylors countersuit and ordered that she pay Lewis
the original $1,500.
Judge Walsh delivered the verdict with a brutally funny dose of extreme
honesty.
Ms. Taylor, you asked Ms. Lewis to purchase some more botulism for you. She
did, the wise judge began. You said you would pay her and you didnt. It is
unfortunate that your lips exploded, but thats not a fact germane to this
case. Your lips exploded because youve been stabbing them with unknown
substances for years. They finally had enough. Your lips did. They couldnt
take it anymore.
Walsh added, You have been inflating those things like helium balloons for
too long and then they burst. And that is why they exploded. In fact, you
need to take responsibility for that. You both need to take responsibility
for the fact that youre middle-aged women, not teenagers. Theres nothing
wrong with being older women. Theres dignity and beauty that comes with
that, or should or would, if not for the botulism.
The first episode brings sanity back to the legal system like never before.
In Walshs JUDGED courtroom, pleading for mercy leads to harsher
punishments and flimsy excuses only serve to hurt your case. Real-life
litigants bring Walsh their small claims with the hope of earning his
sympathy. Anyone whos listened to his daily podcast or follows Walsh on
Twitter knows theyre bound to leave disappointed.
Theres a whole season ahead filled with unbelievable cases, wild situations,
and the ever-constant presence of Judge Walsh to hand down his judgment calls
for all of it. As he says in the shows opening, if you dont enjoy it, its
because theres something wrong with you.
The new series premiered last night with the first episode now streaming for
free on DailyWire+, X, Facebook, and YouTube.
New episodes of JUDGED will drop weekly on Tuesdays, exclusively on
DailyWire+.
--
Let's go Brandon!
was ascending the bench to hand down legally binding decisions in small
claims court. But no one could have predicted the curious case of exploding
lips.
Episode one set the stage for a hilariously unpredictable season of JUDGED
by Matt Walsh. One of the first cases on the docket involved Daphne Lewis,
who brought a suit against Tam Taylor regarding a payment dispute over
cosmetic products they agreed to purchase together.
Lewis told Judge Walsh that she is owed $1,500 for Korean lip filler she
ordered for both of them. But Taylor opted to countersue, claiming that her
lips literally exploded during a flight at 30,000 feet after getting the
injections. Taylor insisted she was owed $5,000 for the medical expenses
related to reconstructing her mangled lips.
The episode features some graphic photos of Taylors lips post-explosion.
Judge Walsh responded by noting that while he has a lot of fears and
anxieties about flying on planes, he never stopped to worry that maybe part
of my body will explode.
Walsh chastised both women for opting for cosmetic surgery in the first
place. He ultimately ruled that both women were at fault for refusing to age
gracefully, but rejected Taylors countersuit and ordered that she pay Lewis
the original $1,500.
Judge Walsh delivered the verdict with a brutally funny dose of extreme
honesty.
Ms. Taylor, you asked Ms. Lewis to purchase some more botulism for you. She
did, the wise judge began. You said you would pay her and you didnt. It is
unfortunate that your lips exploded, but thats not a fact germane to this
case. Your lips exploded because youve been stabbing them with unknown
substances for years. They finally had enough. Your lips did. They couldnt
take it anymore.
Walsh added, You have been inflating those things like helium balloons for
too long and then they burst. And that is why they exploded. In fact, you
need to take responsibility for that. You both need to take responsibility
for the fact that youre middle-aged women, not teenagers. Theres nothing
wrong with being older women. Theres dignity and beauty that comes with
that, or should or would, if not for the botulism.
The first episode brings sanity back to the legal system like never before.
In Walshs JUDGED courtroom, pleading for mercy leads to harsher
punishments and flimsy excuses only serve to hurt your case. Real-life
litigants bring Walsh their small claims with the hope of earning his
sympathy. Anyone whos listened to his daily podcast or follows Walsh on
Twitter knows theyre bound to leave disappointed.
Theres a whole season ahead filled with unbelievable cases, wild situations,
and the ever-constant presence of Judge Walsh to hand down his judgment calls
for all of it. As he says in the shows opening, if you dont enjoy it, its
because theres something wrong with you.
The new series premiered last night with the first episode now streaming for
free on DailyWire+, X, Facebook, and YouTube.
New episodes of JUDGED will drop weekly on Tuesdays, exclusively on
DailyWire+.
--
Let's go Brandon!